Babies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It seems that the babies are back in season. Everyone I know seems to either have just had a baby, is pregnant with one, trying for one.......... The magical sense of babies is drifting in syncronicity.

But not with me. I´m not going to be one who harangues lyrically about the mirth of pregnancy. I´m not the one who will have looks of rapture of my face as I explain that being pregnant was the most important and magical time of my life. In fact, for me, pregnancy was something to be endured in order that my children can be brought into this world.

My pregnancies were textbook cases. If the textbook said that you may get swollen feet, I got it. If the textbook said that you may experience indegestion, it means that I spent nine months waiting for the pain to go away. When the textbook says that some woman may experience nausea the whole pregnancy, that was me. My pregnancy with Sweetheart had me getting swollen fingers like arthritis when I went into the heat. And of course this was over the hottest summer in 50 years. With Herzie my belly was so big that I was unable to drive for the last four months as my feet couldn´t reach the pedals (and we live in the country which meant that I was isolated until my husband came home each day). Through both I had such exhaustion that was unshakeable. I had baby brain where I couldn´t remember anything. I had hormonal deficiencies which had me crying when people talked to me. I had to wear maternity clothes at two months and I didn´t have any pregnancy bloom, I just looked fat. My bones ached. My body ached. I waited for the end.

Then once you get over the pregnancies, the birth comes. Both my babies refused to come out. With Sweetheart I was 3 days late and had to be induced homeopathically as my waters had broken. (six hours). Herzie was another story. At 10 days overdue I refused to leave the hospital until she was in my arms (not very politely. I just sat and said I´m not moving unless it was to the maternity ward). I was induced. First with an infusion. For 5 bloody hours. No contraction, just aching pains. The fabulous midwife tried everything; homeopathic drops, massages on every part of my body, crystals, klangschale (you know those Tibetan bowls) massage, chanting, clanging balls, baths. To no avail. Then a suppository. Then the second. For 2 days I was in hospital being induced. F. went to bed at 10pm on the second night but I said that I was going to keep walking until the baby was out. Finally a contraction at midnight. Then another. I asked a midwife (another one) if this was labour. Most probably not, she said. I lay down. After an hour I asked for F. to be woken. They were busy and asked me to go myself. But I couldn´t move. At 1:30 am he came and I screamed for an epidural. While waiting for an anaethesist I was told that I couldn´t have any pain relievers (no such things as gas and air in the hospitals) as I was in the last stage. At 2:30 am Herzie was born. 5kg. Two and a half hours labour from first contraction to coming out. She is our last baby.

But I must admit, it wasn´t all bad. It is magical when the baby starts to move for the first time. And how they move when they hear particular music or when they hear F. talking. And when they are in your arms, it makes it all worth while. Not that I haven´t forgotten (unlike the textbooks which say you will).